Remember when MTV showed (uninterrupted) videos all day long, instead of only during the ghettoized hours of something like 3AM-6AM?
I, on a whim, taped one of the buttcrack-of-dawn showings and have spent the week watching a couple videos here, another there.
I have come to the following conclusions upon viewing the Gwen Stefani video for "Cool:"
Also, I finally (finally!) saw a Gorillaz video and have discovered I love their videos as much as I like their music. w007 and so forth for animated videos. (The bassist had me laughing my arse off at the end, and I so love the way the lead gorilla swung his legs while he played guitar.) I didn't even mind that it ran twice in an hour, in spite of what I know are hundreds, if not thousands of other videos I know they could play in that time slot. (I guess MTV's not really into that whole "variety" thing. Many other videos were replayed, ad nauseum.) I want the Gorillaz to be featured in a video game with Donkey Kong and his cohorts. Gorillaz v. DK! of summat like. That would be awesome.
Moving on, MTV's programmers appear to be in love with My Chemical Romance's "Helena" video, which is actually rather boring, considering what they could have done with the song. It has its moments, but it looks like it was scripted/choreographed by the angsty emo teens who make up a large portion of My Chemical Romance's listening audience. That said, I want one of those nifty black umbrellas with the red interior. So emo/goth! Hee!
"Pretty" emo boys make me wish I could point a wand at the screen and say, "Dance, little emo boy, dance!" and shoot nasty curses at their feet. "Dance for me! muhahahahaha!" They're hysterical, honestly. *laughs at the emo/angst* ... This is completely hypocritical of me, as I was the emo-est of all throughout my teen years and for a goodly portion of my life after that. (I wish I were as good at applying eyeliner as emo boys are.)
I'm completely sick of the "cute/sexy" girl/boy bands where they think they can get away with boring-ass music because the performers are "teh sexx!1!!" Ugh. Enough already. There's enough shitty music out there. Just have them do Playboy/-girl spreads and the pay-per-view porn videos and leave the music alone.
Jessica Simpson is now channeling Britney Spears's unmarried, thin self in her new video. The untalented attempting to show talent by mimicking the untalented. Fascinating. Furthermore, as of this video, it's official that Willie Nelson has not even one proton of self-respect left. Seriously. Someone should have shot him in the head long before he reached this nadir in his "career."
In an entirely different genre, Missy Elliot kicks ass. Holy crap, I so very wish I could dance like that. (I'm so fecking white. *sobs*) The choreographer for her video "Lose Control" needs to take the My Chemical Romance choreographer aside and give the emo some pointers re: rhythm. If Shakira's fucktard greased-up boobie-pop "dancing" wins out over "Loser Control" for best dancing at the VMAs, I'll know Shakira really has turned tricks to make her way to the "top." (However, I can't figure out the why for the last minute or so of Missy Elliot's video. Maybe it's 'cause I'm suburban white girl?)
And, HOLY FUCK! BOYZ N DA HOOD! GAH! *has fallen into timewarp and iz ded* (I can't help but snicker at "P Diddy." That's one man who is secure in his masculinity if he's willing to own up to that nickname.) ... Oh, wait. No, it's some sort of bullshit, "gangsta" BNDH, not the real one. How... um, sad?
Finally, remember when male rappers had a sense of humor about themselves, could rap in actual English, and didn't have to feature themselves on the street corner holding scantily-clad "'hos" and large wads of cash in their videos in order to be considered legitimate rappers? When their political rants were actual cogent and firey and topical? Well, I do. *sighs and lights a candle for the (degenerated state of) rap* It's all the fault of asshat, suburban white boys. Those are the ones who are buying "gangsta" rap, goddamit. They've fucked up rap for the rest of us. Grr!
I have come to the following conclusions upon viewing the Gwen Stefani video for "Cool:"
- her current persona is a cuter version of early-90s Madonna, but differs from early-90s Madonna in that Stefani actually has a singing voice and is, as I mentioned earlier in this run-on sentence, much cuter;
- her music has become very boring since she went solo;
- while very teen-boy-fantasy as a platinum blonde, I think she looks much, much prettier as a brunette.
Also, I finally (finally!) saw a Gorillaz video and have discovered I love their videos as much as I like their music. w007 and so forth for animated videos. (The bassist had me laughing my arse off at the end, and I so love the way the lead gorilla swung his legs while he played guitar.) I didn't even mind that it ran twice in an hour, in spite of what I know are hundreds, if not thousands of other videos I know they could play in that time slot. (I guess MTV's not really into that whole "variety" thing. Many other videos were replayed, ad nauseum.) I want the Gorillaz to be featured in a video game with Donkey Kong and his cohorts. Gorillaz v. DK! of summat like. That would be awesome.
Moving on, MTV's programmers appear to be in love with My Chemical Romance's "Helena" video, which is actually rather boring, considering what they could have done with the song. It has its moments, but it looks like it was scripted/choreographed by the angsty emo teens who make up a large portion of My Chemical Romance's listening audience. That said, I want one of those nifty black umbrellas with the red interior. So emo/goth! Hee!
"Pretty" emo boys make me wish I could point a wand at the screen and say, "Dance, little emo boy, dance!" and shoot nasty curses at their feet. "Dance for me! muhahahahaha!" They're hysterical, honestly. *laughs at the emo/angst* ... This is completely hypocritical of me, as I was the emo-est of all throughout my teen years and for a goodly portion of my life after that. (I wish I were as good at applying eyeliner as emo boys are.)
I'm completely sick of the "cute/sexy" girl/boy bands where they think they can get away with boring-ass music because the performers are "teh sexx!1!!" Ugh. Enough already. There's enough shitty music out there. Just have them do Playboy/-girl spreads and the pay-per-view porn videos and leave the music alone.
Jessica Simpson is now channeling Britney Spears's unmarried, thin self in her new video. The untalented attempting to show talent by mimicking the untalented. Fascinating. Furthermore, as of this video, it's official that Willie Nelson has not even one proton of self-respect left. Seriously. Someone should have shot him in the head long before he reached this nadir in his "career."
In an entirely different genre, Missy Elliot kicks ass. Holy crap, I so very wish I could dance like that. (I'm so fecking white. *sobs*) The choreographer for her video "Lose Control" needs to take the My Chemical Romance choreographer aside and give the emo some pointers re: rhythm. If Shakira's fucktard greased-up boobie-pop "dancing" wins out over "Loser Control" for best dancing at the VMAs, I'll know Shakira really has turned tricks to make her way to the "top." (However, I can't figure out the why for the last minute or so of Missy Elliot's video. Maybe it's 'cause I'm suburban white girl?)
And, HOLY FUCK! BOYZ N DA HOOD! GAH! *has fallen into timewarp and iz ded* (I can't help but snicker at "P Diddy." That's one man who is secure in his masculinity if he's willing to own up to that nickname.) ... Oh, wait. No, it's some sort of bullshit, "gangsta" BNDH, not the real one. How... um, sad?
Finally, remember when male rappers had a sense of humor about themselves, could rap in actual English, and didn't have to feature themselves on the street corner holding scantily-clad "'hos" and large wads of cash in their videos in order to be considered legitimate rappers? When their political rants were actual cogent and firey and topical? Well, I do. *sighs and lights a candle for the (degenerated state of) rap* It's all the fault of asshat, suburban white boys. Those are the ones who are buying "gangsta" rap, goddamit. They've fucked up rap for the rest of us. Grr!
2 comments:
you've got good taste in music :)..
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! I've every-flavor-beans-type taste in music. (Excepting Elvis and country-western. They are the "boogey" and "poo" beans of the music world.) I like Bavarian female choral music, Ladysmith Black Mambazo (whic I can't spell at nearly 2 in the morning), Chemical Brothers, Ella Fitzgerald, The Beatles, Chopin, John Coltrane, The Police, Beck.... I'm CRAZY.
Um, but, you know. Thanks.
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