There are some things I cannot let myself think about. Body and Soul: The death of Dilawar is one of them. I read about them, because it's important for me to know what the representatives of my nation are doing. The people who do these things represent me, and therefore what they do reflects upon me. In a distant way, I am responsible for it. So, when innocent men are beaten to death, I'm responsible. Same as when retarded people are put to death here in the States. If I were a better citizen, this wouldn't happen. But it does. And I can't function if I think about that.
This is why these things happen, of course. Most people can't function if they actually sit down and think it through. Okay, there are probably people who enjoy the thought of innocent blood on their hands. I don't like to think about those people, either. It's too hard. It's too heavy a weight. It's easier to worry about what the fuck I'm going to do about paying these bills, all of which are overdue and accruing fees and ruining my credit rating. That's insurmountable, but it doesn't result in fucking up anyone's life but my own. No one dies. No one's in pain.
There are people who think no one should think about these things, the torture, the death by torture, that it's blown out of proportion. Me, I got an A in Ethics. I have a pretty good idea of Right and Wrong. This is something which bothers me. As an American. As a Christian. As a human fucking being. This torture doesn't stop terrorism. It doesn't get decent information. Anyone will confess anything under torture: look at the witch trials of Europe. Who the fuck believes there were actual witches who confessed under torture then? Yet somehow, this time, we got the torture right? Somehow, this time, it's okay when innocents die because of it? When the fuck are we going to learn? If we're a Christian nation, why the hell are we acting against the tenets of Christ Himself? Is this really what Jesus would do? I'm having a serious moral problem here. What the hell is a voiceless American supposed to do? Rant on her fucking blog? Even those who read it, all 0.5 of them, don't give a shit that some chick is bothered by her country's rapid moral descent. (Please, please tell me there was a time we wouldn't have done this. Please let me believe there was a time when my country wouldn't even have done this.)
I can't handle this. I'm going to go watch some anime, surf for jobs, edit my resume, and pretend none of this is happening, like a good little American. God help us.
This is why these things happen, of course. Most people can't function if they actually sit down and think it through. Okay, there are probably people who enjoy the thought of innocent blood on their hands. I don't like to think about those people, either. It's too hard. It's too heavy a weight. It's easier to worry about what the fuck I'm going to do about paying these bills, all of which are overdue and accruing fees and ruining my credit rating. That's insurmountable, but it doesn't result in fucking up anyone's life but my own. No one dies. No one's in pain.
There are people who think no one should think about these things, the torture, the death by torture, that it's blown out of proportion. Me, I got an A in Ethics. I have a pretty good idea of Right and Wrong. This is something which bothers me. As an American. As a Christian. As a human fucking being. This torture doesn't stop terrorism. It doesn't get decent information. Anyone will confess anything under torture: look at the witch trials of Europe. Who the fuck believes there were actual witches who confessed under torture then? Yet somehow, this time, we got the torture right? Somehow, this time, it's okay when innocents die because of it? When the fuck are we going to learn? If we're a Christian nation, why the hell are we acting against the tenets of Christ Himself? Is this really what Jesus would do? I'm having a serious moral problem here. What the hell is a voiceless American supposed to do? Rant on her fucking blog? Even those who read it, all 0.5 of them, don't give a shit that some chick is bothered by her country's rapid moral descent. (Please, please tell me there was a time we wouldn't have done this. Please let me believe there was a time when my country wouldn't even have done this.)
I can't handle this. I'm going to go watch some anime, surf for jobs, edit my resume, and pretend none of this is happening, like a good little American. God help us.
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